This Too Shall Pass

This month’s theme for Heads Above The Waves is “where you are now isn’t where you’re always going to be”, and that’s such an important message that I want to remind you of. Whoever you are now, and whatever you’re going through: this too shall pass.

The word “transient” means “lasting for only a short time” – and there are lots of philosophies that say the key to being happier is to realise that everything is transient. Nothing lasts forever. And that goes for good and bad stuff.

Realising that everything is transient means that if something’s good – then unfortunately it won’t necessarily stay good forever. But that’s not a bad thing! That should be inspiration to enjoy the good times while they’re happening, and while you can. Really live in the moment, and take in good and positive things as much as possible. Make memories and remind yourself of them. Something people have told us helps them is to keep a box full of memories of happy times – they look back over it whenever things become too much. Or it could even be as simple as Instagramming or blogging the stuff that makes you happy as it’s happening, and scrolling back through your feed when you need a reminder of the positives in your life.

But it also means that however bad your situation is, it WILL change. Sometimes a situation changes anyway – do you ever look back on where you were a year or two ago and see how different everything is now, even though you didn’t make any conscious decision to change everything?

And sometimes you need to make an effort to change your situation for yourself. The first (and most important step) is deciding that you want to change where you’re at right now. Reminding yourself that a bad situation doesn’t have to last forever is a good place to start.

However bad you’re feeling right now – that feeling won’t last forever. There are people who’ve shared their story through Heads Above The Waves (myself included) who’ve felt crushingly low – and felt like it was never going to get better. But you know what? It did. And they’re now in more control of their feelings and telling the tale. There are so many examples of people who’ve survived the worst feelings in the world. It’s not necessarily going to be quick or easy, but the way you’re feeling right now, isn’t going to last forever. It is possible to feel better, and you will get there. I promise.

Bad days are always going to creep up on you, but reminding yourself that they won’t last forever might help you get through them. Sometimes you just need to anchor down and wait out the storm.

However much you’re struggling right now – it won’t be this hard forever. The struggle will pass too. Training yourself to think positively, and catch yourself thinking negatively before it spirals out of control makes it easier to keep yourself in check when you feel overwhelmed next time. Every time that you use a positive coping mechanism instead of a negative one, it gets that little bit easier. Every time that you reach out and ask for help and support, it becomes easier to reach out for help and support next time you really need it. Don’t be afraid or ashamed of asking for help, because everyone’s human, and everyone struggles with something. By accepting that you don’t have to struggle alone, you can reach out and get the help you want and need.

So remember: everything is transient. Where you are now isn’t where you’re always going to be. You have the power to change your situation, control your feelings, and get the support you need to make sure you’re not struggling alone.

– Si