Keep Driving Forward

I read this quote recently that said

There’s a reason the windshield is bigger than the rear view mirror – where you’re going is more important than where you’ve been.

And it’s really stuck with me.

Obviously in the context of a car, having mirrors helps you see what’s going on around you and behind you. They help you spot hazards and know what actions you need to take next. It’s good and it’s safe to be aware of where you are and where you’ve been while you’re driving on your journey.

And that’s true in life. It’s good to be aware of your situation, and be able to respond accordingly. It means that your judgements as you’re moving forward are based on your experiences that are behind you, and all that continues to happen around you.

But one of the tricky bits about driving (at least when you’re first learning) is paying attention to all the different mirrors, as well as concentrating on the road in front of you. The way you do it is by spending most time looking at where you’re going, while frequently glancing in the mirrors around you for no more than a second or two (unless you’re about to perform a manoeuvre). But the point is: you can’t spend too long looking at your rear view mirror at what’s behind you, because then you’re not concentrating on what’s happening ahead of you. In a car, that’s obviously really dangerous or at least means you might miss an exit, or a chance to stop and get some petrol. In life, it means you’re not paying attention to where you’re trying to get to – you might end up missing a chance to heal yourself and get stronger, or you might miss out on an opportunity you’d been looking forward to, because you’re spending too long looking back on the past. Be AWARE of it, and learn from it, but don’t spend too long staring at it. Keep on looking forward at where you’re going and where you want to be.

I’m something of a nervous (for lack of a better word) driver. Like most areas of my life, I assume that everyone else knows better than I do, and I have a tendency to panic if I don’t know exactly where I’m meant to be going, what lane I’m meant to be in, or what to do if something goes wrong. I know I need to have more confidence in myself when I drive. But the biggest way that I’ve built up my confidence (and continue to do so!) is by just getting out there and doing it. I’ve driven all over the country on tour with my band, something that even 18 months ago, I never would’ve believed I could do. And that’s led to me becoming a bit more confident in myself, and led to a bunch of great new experiences and memories. I guess what I’m getting at, is that you gotta out yourself out there and take opportunities to better yourself as they come up – even if the thought of them seems scary and daunting!

The final thing I want to point out with this driving metaphor (I’m really driving this point home – ahohoho) is that other drivers are sometimes the most dangerous bit about driving. If someone else isn’t paying attention, or isn’t driving responsibly, it can put other people in danger. And you’ve got to be aware of that, and aware of what other drivers are doing.

In life, there are always gonna be people who aren’t thinking, or don’t realise that they’re potentially hurting others with their actions, there are some people who are impatient, there are some people who are angry, and there are some people who think they know better than everyone else. (If you drive, you probably know the sort of drivers I have in mind when I say that..) Other people have the potential to really hurt and upset you – they may not realise it, while they’re on their own journey through life, but they can be really getting you down.

So what I do when there’s someone behind me or around me who’s driving in a way I don’t like, I’ll tend to find somewhere to pull in, and let them go by. Or I’ll take a slightly different route to make sure I’m not affected by their actions. Sure, it’s quite a defensive reaction (I’m a nervous driver, remember?) but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with sometimes “pulling over” in life – stopping for a minute or two to get yourself together. If someone makes you mad on the road, you don’t necessarily think straight while you’re all angry and worked up, and then that affects the way that you drive and the care you take of yourself. So pull over and take a minute to let it go, and then continue on your journey, so you’re safe, and on the way to where you want to be.