Life’s pretty tough sometimes. A lot of bad things happen, and they don’t always make sense. One of the most frustrating things is when bad things happen to good people – people who don’t deserve to be dealing with all the negative stuff life throws their way. And the truth is: unless you’ve killed someone, you’re probably not a bad person. Sure, you might be a right little terror in school, you might lose your temper and shout at your friends and family, but you’re not a bad person. You’re a person that bad things happen to, and you react in a certain, perhaps negative, way.
That’s what self-harm is. Self-harm is a negative reaction to a negative situation. Our approach at Heads Above The Waves is that self-harm is a problem in itself, but that there’s got to be something going on that’s causing it, that makes you feel like self-harm is a necessary way to cope.
Here’s the real game changer though: you’re worth way more than self-harm.
Nothing in this world should make you feel like you deserve self-harm.
If you feel the urge to self-harm, try to stop yourself and ask: “is this really worth hurting myself over?”
If you find yourself feeling so low that self-harm seems like the only option to deal with something, then it’s time to figure out what it is that’s causing you to feel that way. Why is it getting you down so much? And then, what can you do about it?
It might be that you can just walk away from the situation.
It might be that you can talk to someone about it, let them know how much it’s affecting you, and figure out how to make it better, together.
It might be that there’s nothing you can do to change the situation, but you can change the way you react to it.
That could be coming up with alternative coping techniques – like the ones we’ve been doing in the workshops, or something else like exercise or cooking.
Or it might be that you can’t do anything about what’s happening to you, but you just need to learn to let it go. Rise above it. Be better than all the negative stuff happening to you. Be the bigger person than the bully who’s getting to you. Be stronger than you convince yourself you are.
Because nothing is worth you hurting yourself.
You’re worth so much more than that.
Don’t you forget it.